Let’s assume you have already travelled to Ukraine where you had several really romantic successful dates with beautiful family oriented Ukrainian lady. You have survived and actually enjoyed first dinner date at the cozy restaurant. You were witty, romantic, charming and you haven’t forgotten to bring her flowers and to open the doors for her. She was wearing a beautiful blue dress and matching high heels shoes that she has bought especially for this occasion. You had a romantic second date in the park: you have walked down her favorite alley, took several pictures together, had hot cappuccino and even shared a piece of chocolate cake with your date. You have exchanged phone numbers and have texted in between the dates. For the third date you took her out for lunch and you have decided to go ice-skating, even though you have never been fond of ice-skating. The week has past as a single moment and here you are having your farewell dinner. The candles are burning and red wine sparkles in the glasses, but all you can see is her smile.
She saw you off to the airport the next day and you have promised to write her every day!
How to keep the magic that two of you have created during the dates? How not to lose what you have achieved in relationship with the Ukrainian lady during this short week and to bring your relationship with the Ukrainian lady to the next level even when you are away from her? I have watched so many potential relationship with the Ukrainian lady ruined during this fragile early stage. It is hard to maintain relationship with any lady at the early stage even if you live in the same city, but how is it possible to keep and even develop long distance international relationship?
As a professional matchmaker I can tell you that a short break and long distance communication can be even useful. Two of you will have a chance to think about your time together, to romanticize this time and each other and to play the romantic game of correspondence. I have no doubts you have experienced the anticipation when you wait for a message or email from the lady you like. This email or message has to be romantic. I am sure you do not expect it to include the long and monotone description how she went to the supermarket to buy glass cleaner. You expect her to write how much she misses you and to dream about the possible future that you will share one day.
How often should you talk to the lady after your first trip to Ukraine?
To be honest there is no exact rule, how often you should write to your Ukrainian lady. Everyone is unique. You should send the first message of course. You can send it right from the airport telling her that you already miss her and the wonderful time you have spent together. Wait for her response and then you can ask her would she like to skype with you and you should set the time. If you have already started to text with each other using Viber or other messenger, you should continue using it. Changing the method of communication can be stressful at the early stage of relationship.
Most of my female clients who have been into long-distance relationship admit that it was really sweet to receive “Good Morning” and “Sweet Dreams” messages. Don’t forget that such messages will be unique and fresh for several weeks perhaps, but then they will lose their novelty and romantic impact.
During the first several weeks after your trip to Ukraine your memories about the wonderful time that you have spend together will be still fresh. Don’t forget to write her that you miss holding her hand, like you did while walking in the park. Tell her that you can’t forget her eyes when she entered the restaurant during your first date, or her laugh while watching a movie together. These must be the moments that only two of you have shared. If you took pictures together – send them to her.
During the first two weeks the lady will still feel your presence, but after that it will start fading. It would be nice to remind her about you. The easiest and most proven way is to order flowers. I hope till this time you have already learnt what flowers she likes. Don’t forget to add a card. Write her that you are thinking about her and want to bring smile to her face. Watch her reaction to your surprise. Usually the lady will text you and send photos of her and the flowers. The flowers will be the tangible proof that you are real and still interested.
After several weeks of long-distance communication you should start making plans about the next meeting. You should mention to the lady why you can’t meet with her right now. For example, you can’t have vacation at the moment, because you are working on something important. She should know that you want to meet with her, but can’t do it straight away.
Since you have left Ukraine and have started long-distance relationship with the Ukrainian lady she will feel your presence for 3-5 weeks and after that it will start fading. You should plan the next meeting not later than in 3 months, otherwise the lady will forget you and will consider you not serious. It doesn’t mean that she is not serious and not interested. Just imagine that 2 months after she has met you, you still didn’t make any plans to see her again. You send her sweet messages, but in her mind probably you have someone back home, otherwise you would already make plans to see her again. She thinks that perhaps your trip to Ukraine was just an adventure for you and you have no serious intentions. In this mood she is attending a birthday party of her friend and there she meets Sergey, who is single and a brother of her friend’s friend. He asks her out to have coffee. He is there in the same city. And just like that she forgets you completely, because there is an ocean between you and in her mind you have no intentions to cross it again.
You will come over in 6 or 8 month and will have to start your search from the very beginning, hoping that this time your communication with the lady will survive the distance. To prevent this you should understand from the very beginning, that you should plan the meeting with the lady in 3-4 months after your first meeting.
These were just the basic advices. I hope they will help you to maintain healthy, romantic long-distance relationship with the Ukrainian lady that will lead to a happy offline love story one day.
From Svetlana Mukha, with love
We also recommend you to watch the video on this topic here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39ZHSsSSp3U