10 Things You Should Never Do On A First Date
Some men have gone through hundreds of best first dates, others fail every other time, thinking they would never ever do it again. What is it that they have done wrong?
Having analyzed various “fail-of-the-year” stories, we have created our own list of things not to do on the first date to help you, my dear reader, to avoid becoming one of the poor guys, who have wasted their chance.
- Be late.
- Not to plan everything beforehand.
- Not to take care of the lady.
- Order dishes uncomfortable to eat.
- Be selfish.
- Be judgy.
- Look at other ladies.
- Remember your ex GFs
- Be a cheapskate.
- Not to make a beautiful ending.
A woman is the only one, who can afford to be late (and no, it’s not being late). And she has good reasons: to make perfect makeup, curl her hair, change her mind and straighten it, try on three dresses, jeans with a blouse and a trouser suit, realize that orange shoes do not match any of the options, burst into tears and completely redo the makeup. The whole procedure can take much longer than expected. But it is unforgivable for men to be late: allowing yourself a delay of even 20 minutes, you risk making the girl see you as unreliable and simply ill-mannered.
Even before the beginning, you should already have a clear plan of how a date should go: where you will take the girl, what places are best for taking a walk, where you will have dinner, etc. Even if the scenario is completely changed for some reason, it doesn’t matter. The main thing is that this very scenario should exist. Believe me, hardly any girl wants to hear something like “Did you happen to think what things to do in a date?” Any representative of the beautiful half of humanity initially expects an initiative from a man – just accept it and think over a plan for at least a few first meetings.
Take a look at your partner. If she came on a date in high-heeled shoes – most likely, your idea to get around all the best parks in the city, and then turn into an old cobblestone street and walk downhill along is what not to do on a first date. Walks in the fresh air are undoubtedly wonderful, but girls are extremely delicate creatures, and therefore comfort means a lot for the absolute majority of them. And if instead of joyful emotions you do not want to see tears on the face of your chosen one because of the corns worn down to blood, it is better to stop at the option “have a nice time in a restaurant or cinema”. Save active scripts for the future.
Wings, ribs, and other food that you can’t eat without getting your hands dirty are absolute taboos and red flags on a first date. The sauce that tries to “settle” on your chin while you concentrate on gnawing a piece of juicy meat on the bone will clearly not add to your charm. Especially squeamish and impressionable young ladies will run away as soon as they have such an opportunity. Naturally, in this case, you cannot even dream of the first kiss.
By the way, try to find out beforehand if your chosen one is a vegetarian or not. After all, if the answer is yes, you should take care of finding a good restaurant with a delicious vegetarian menu in advance.
Naturally, not a single first rendezvous is complete without presenting your precious self in the most favorable light. And this is important: you need to make the lady interested. But the measure is necessary here, as never before: if you talk exclusively about yourself all evening, you risk not seeing your companion again. Moreover, rumors about your talkativeness and arrogance can spread at the speed of light.
To make everything go as harmoniously as possible, follow the 50/50 ratio. In other words, tell a curious fact about yourself, and then ask the girl about something on the same topic. And, which is important, listen to her to the end, or even better – show your lively curiosity. Make sure that the evening does not turn into an interview: your conversation should bring you pleasure, and not drops of cold sweat on the woman’s forehead.
Even if your new friend suddenly tells you that she believes in unicorns, loves to brew tea bags three times, and considers football to be the most boring of games – do not rush to sound the alarm. The first meetings are invented precisely to let you both properly assess each other, understand whether you are comfortable together or not. Therefore, listen calmly and draw your own conclusions. But in no case start a heated debate on the topic of personal preferences. These are things not to talk about on the first date as you cannot change the girl’s tastes, but you have good chances to be remembered as a hysterical idiot.
Since you have chosen this particular girl, the following are things to avoid on the first date: showing attention to other ladies, and appreciating every beauty passing by. Even if you are so loving and all the above maneuvers occur at the level of male instincts, i.e. almost uncontrollably, then try and gather all your will into a fist, and this evening be with the girl who came to meet you. Otherwise, it could be you’re the last time you see each other. Girls have unique peripheral vision, and even if it seems to you that all your “Casanova” glances at other women will remain unnoticed, you are deeply mistaken.
It is not the best idea of how to behave on a first date. Today your story is “tabula rasa”. Do not remember previous relationships in either a bad or a good way. In the first case, the girl will note for herself that she is also not insured against unflattering reviews if she suddenly falls into the list of your exes. And in the second – she will think: if you speak so well of your past lover, then it is possible that your feelings for her have not cooled down yet.
If your new companion touches this topic herself tell a few words about your ex, but do it as coolly and informatively as possible.
How to act on the first date? Definitely not like this. Believe me, any manifestations of your greed will be immediately noticed and included in the list of your biggest flaws. Therefore, never use a calculator to count the “correct” tip amount, and in no case refuse to pay for service in general. Even if the latter was disgusting. And, of course, forget about offering to share the bill. Believe me, it doesn’t make you look your best.
All, even the most self-confident girls, fall into a state of trembling having said goodbye to a man after the first evening out. “What if he didn’t like me? What if I’m too fat? Hell, I shouldn’t have worn light trousers, they make me look fat. And there was no need to talk about that funny incident – now he definitely thinks that I am a fool,”- such thoughts often settle in the minds of most young ladies.
If you really liked your chosen one and you would like to continue the relationship, put a beautiful end to the date. In other words, before you say goodbye, be sure to let the woman understand that she has intrigued you very much. For these purposes, any ideas are suitable: beautiful words, romantic kisses and, of course, a special SMS that you should send after the end of the date. She will keep this message as a family heirloom, and it is possible that even your future grandchildren will read it.
Valeria Matskevich With Love.