10 Warning Signs Your Relationship Is About To Be Over
People stay in relationship, suffering because of different reasons: deep attachment to the person, a fear of being alone, a toxic addiction or just disbelief of a better future. They just do not admit a break up and the only way to break free is to make a decision.
If a relationship is ending, it is not always a bad thing. It is the beginning of something new, if one door closes, the other one opens. But remember, if you don`t close that door, you automatically delay another one. It is effective to rip off “the band aid”, if the outcome is inevitable.
How do you know when relationship is about to be over? Pay attention to the signs mentioned below that your relationship is over:
- A partner spends more time with friends and family. She always finds excuses that she has to go and see her best friend, because she is going through a tough break up and needs support 24/7, she suddenly must see all her distant relatives you were not aware of their existence. It is a red flag that your significant one found emotional connection somewhere else, not with you anymore.
- How can you tell when already broken relationship is over? If there is no communication. Your talks shouldn`t limit with just boring daily stuff: “Did you feed the cat?”, “Buy some milk on the way home”, “You forgot to wash the dishes”.
- These are dangerous signs in a relationship if you express your disappointment on strangers (waiters, cashiers at the supermarkets), you flame from within without a reason. When your friends ask you how is life, you have nothing to say, your life seems shallow and not interesting. There are no hobbies left anymore, everything seems dull, you can spend hours just doing nothing. Let a partner know how you feel. If there is no concern about it, these are the signs of affair ending. You may knock once or twice, but if there is no response, it is high time to close this door until you have an emotional breakdown or depression.
- You do not engage in any activities together. It is important to have space from each other, but not too much to become strangers at all. You are two independent individuals, but in a couple, you should spend time and have common fun routine ( for example making tacos on Wednesdays, have a date night from time to time, go jogging in the morning, watch a movie once a week or more often).
- You are not in a rush to go home, hoping to avoid a partner`s presence. If something important happened in your life like a long-awaited promotion, or on the contrary a loss of a client, a change of a working place and you don`t share it with your lady.
- One of you has changed. People change and grow, but if you noticed big changes like gaining weight too much, a person doesn`t care about appearance anymore. Neglecting your own body is not a good sign. For men, it can be noticed through not shaving for a long time, eating in front of TV or computer and leaving dishes next to it without bothering to wash them, not having shower and not changing clothes. As for women, it is gaining weight, eating too unhealthy food or vice versa not eating at all.
- Signs of a relationship is over are no affection. Changes in the bedroom are not always death sentence, but still it is a red alert that something is really wrong.
- Flaws outshine positive qualities. When people are in love and at the beginning of dating, they see only the best features, but with time they discover each other more and it is normal to notice some flaws. No one is perfect, but if you see nothing but negative qualities, you are irritated by small things (how she dries her hair in the morning, the way she eats, maybe you think she chews food very loud, but before it was ok).
- No future plans. You used to have common plans for at least next 5 years, but now you are not sure if you can handle it even one more month. If you don`t see yourself with this person at least in the nearest year, what`s the point of being together then?
- Inner feeling. One of my female friends tells me that her gut instinct never lied to her. They were together for a long time, but didn`t spend time together anymore and started to be more with friends. She decided to talk to him, he said that he has problems at work, that’s why he is so nervous and needs time to be by himself at least one month. But something was wrong, she felt it. Anyway she gave the time he asked for. And two weeks later she found out that he just fell in love with another woman a long time ago and didn`t know how to say it.
- One of you has changed. People change and grow, but if you noticed big changes like gaining weight too much, a person doesn`t care about appearance anymore. Neglecting your own body is not a good sign. For men, it can be noticed through not shaving for a long time, eating in front of TV or computer and leaving dishes next to it without bothering to wash them, not having shower and not changing clothes. As for women, it is gaining weight, eating too unhealthy food or vice versa not eating at all.
When we fall in love, we cannot even imagine that it is going to be over one day. In reality there is no right or wrong way to break up. Everyone is different, we all have different personalities and reasons to make this decision.
How to break up will less emotional pain?
- Do it face to face. Maybe you have gone through email or texts break up. Do you remember how it feels? It can be devastating.
- Forgive and let go.
- Do it with respect and treat each other with dignity.
- Be honest. It is the hardest thing ever, but maybe it will help you or a partner grow and not to repeat the same mistakes more than once. You probably have heard lots of stories how people leave each other without any explanation. It hurts even more, trying to figure out what went wrong.
- Although you maybe tempted to rush a conversation, choose special time and place for it. Do not give the news before the altar at the church or before an important interview in another person`s life.