5 secrets of happy couples in long-term relationships
Many people are surprised how some couples manage to maintain cordial relations throughout long years of living together. Regardless of all difficulties they’ve got over, knowing each other’s flaws by heart, their passion still doesn’t fade. What makes their love so resistant to life trials? Our experts are answering this question in the following lines.
1. Mutual commitment
No, it is not about indulging your partner and putting his priorities above everything else. It is about tolerating his needs and considering them as a vital part of an individual personality. Hardly can we find a person who would perfectly resemble our own interests and will always fulfill our desires. You may spend ages looking out for that Mr Right until once again your countless attempts boil down to another frustration. People are quite different, so if you expect understanding from your partner, make sure you treat him with equal sympathy. For example, if you periodically require solitude to let the mind be consumed by thoughts, it is better to make them aware of this special need of yours. In turn, demonstrate a respectful attitude towards your boy/girlfriend’s requests give them a sense of freedom to behave habitually and don’t take up too much of their personal space. Being provided thus with spiritual comfort he or she will definitely appreciate your involvement as a sign of courtesy.
2. Resolving disagreements
Sometimes even between the most harmonious couples conflicts are unavoidable. Don’t worry, they occur almost in every healthy relationship due to the division of opinions, so they are absolutely normal practice. It is not their frequency, but the way they are dealt with that really defines the quality of your engagement. The ability to find compromise is a fundamental clue to any effective communication as long as you assume that the argument is just about to emerge. Quarrelling and insisting on your rightness will only escalate tension and might consequently lead to a huge row. Many people often put off the problem till it sorts itself out, though it is not a wise decision either. Consequently, the problem remains unsolved, building an invisible barrier between you both and showing up at the most inopportune moments in the form of a nervous breakdown. Allowing stress to take control over your emotions is a great chance of hurting a partner’s feelings. To prevent such unpleasant situations psychologists advise learning how to reckon with others’ views and solve conflicts peacefully.
3. Emotional support
Balancing between your household cores and professional field is like standing on a tight rope. Sooner or later the vigorous pace of life tires to such an extent that we become blinded to important things which are right in front of us our family. Truly unbreakable bonds form in a supportive environment where one stands for another while both are facing a hard time. This is the main reason why couples split up already in a few years after tying the knot. Happiness quickly evaporates the moment carefree living is substituted with parental duties. Rarely do people who are not ready for a serious relationship dare to carry such a responsibility on their shoulders. So, love is not measured in doses of sweet words. It can be sufficiently mature only after numerous obstacles you succeeded to overcome together.
4. Physical affection
Sexual contact with the person you have hots for goes beyond ordinary human instincts. Psychologists believe regular sex in a lasting relationship stimulates higher emotional satisfaction and improves the petting experience.The more you value your partner’s preferences the more pleasure you want to give him/her. That is why happy couples are usually less restrained when it comes to bed and, taking into account their long dating period, are tend to discuss intimate details without any hint of embarrassment. As they are well-informed about each other’s predilections, the arousal level vastly increases, thereby boosting confidence.
5. Honesty and sincerity and trust
Last but not least secret most couples omit and then regret their decision. These three compulsory components must prevail in all transparent romantic (and not only that kind) relations. It is not the incompatible zodiac signs at fault that your dating lasts no longer than a few months, but the lack of faith, sincerity, and trust. Let’s make a fair comparison between happy couples and average ones. Happy couples are sure that their partner is a trustworthy person and is not capable of betrayal. If the person really matters to you, a single thought about cheating on them would sound like sinning. They know they can rely on each other and expect an honest remark without putting on a mask of an impeccable man. Whereas average couples don’t sincerely talk to each other because they either wait for a good excuse to fall out and give each other a silent treatment or just think it is too late to change anything and continue living under a loving disguise. According to spouses from England who have been married for 65 years, David and Margaret Matthews, communication is the most essential element of maintaining a lasting relationship. ‘We always found time to communicate, and, like any couple, we had ups and downs, but we always talked about our concerns’ said Margaret. Don’t be afraid to reveal your feelings to your partner this is your closest person.
So, the main key to keep your relationship fresh is spending every day with them as if it was the last one. Many people over years start taking their partners for granted, forgetting all the wonderful moments they used to enjoy in the past. But people don’t actually change. They only change their attitude towards each other. The main enemy that interferes with a good long-term relationship is an imaginary ideal fairytale. Of course, no problems are handled by the wave of a magic wand, love also requires a lot of work and mutual effort. And that’s what makes us value what we have.