We are touching a very tricky question today – women from Ukraine who live with parents… is it normal? It differs all around the world. In more patriarchal countries it is unacceptable and even dangerous for a woman to live alone before marriage. And it is vice versa in well-developed and democratic countries – for a woman living with parents up to 30 years can sometimes sound strange. Psychologists single out 3 stages of a life cycle of a family:
First stage – a single person starts living alone, on his own. He or she learns how to solve all questions concerning domestic problems. Yes, it can be difficult or expensive, but life is not always a bed of roses.
Second stage – two people start living together. If the first stage was skipped, some difficulties can happen; people do not know how much the life costs or encounter first domestic problems that can seem bigger than they are.
Third stage – family becomes bigger and child appears. And it is preferably that a person had a chance and desire to live alone for some time before it.
But what do we see in reality? How the things are in Ukraine? According to the Research&Branding Group survey, 57% of Ukrainians believe that children should live with parents until they get married and only 19% of them really live with parents, regardless of their marital status. The number is scary, huh? But the reasons why a single woman in her 30s can live with parents in Ukraine can be the following:
- She doesn’t have money to rent or buy an apartment. Yes, the economic situation in the country could be better and she can’t or doesn’t want to find a well-paid job to be independent. Living with parents simply saves her money. It is economical, practical and pragmatic. As a matter of fact, many Ukrainian women tend to realize their natural role more that social, success for them is a happy family, not the high salary or her own apartment. The reasons why she can be not married in her 30s – is a topic for another article 😉
- She can have very close relationships with her parents, she can think that moving out can make her parents upset, or vice versa, she thinks she should pay a lot of attention to them as they are too attached to each other…
- It is comfortable..! She has enough money to rent a flat, but it is such a blessing to have a mother by her side who will keep her clothes clean for her… So a woman can have more time for her hobbies or beloved work. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that she will not be able to manage household in her own family. Obviously such woman has so much to adopt from her mother’s behavior, learn the receipt of the most delicious pie and be a good wife.
- She has strict parents, who are afraid that their daughter will make mistakes living on her own.
- Speaking about Ukraine, patrimonial society framework has been predominant here for many centuries and it was common to live in big families with a grandmother or a grandfather in the head. It is not easy for some people (especially women) to leave this framework behind and get more individualistic. And should they do it? Many families live all together: parents, children, grandchildren, and feel happy and satisfied being a part of one big family.
To sum it up, a 30 year old woman living with parents in Ukrainian space is a little wonder; especially it is much more common in villages and rural area. But with the influence of globalization and economic growth more and more women tend to be independent from their parents. It can depend on her economic situation, bonds with her parents and the traditions in her family.