When a man and a woman are at the stage of developing their relationship, they spend a lot of time together and having different interests is out of the question. Each of the partners is eager to learn about not only each other’s features of character, but also pastimes. Moreover, each of the partners is sure that they have a lot of common interests and they will not get bored if they start living together.
However, as time passes, we can often hear people saying something like: “We have different interests with my partner. Every evening we want to do different things and have nothing to talk about.” Such situation can lead to your relationship going through the stage of “coldness”. Unfortunately, many couples fail to get through it. Therefore, I can state that different interests really can kill a couple.
You may ask me if there is any way out… Luckily there are a couple of things you can do not to become the victims of different interests with your partner.
- The first thing you should do is remember the first days of your being together. What did you use to do? What was your favorite pastime? Which restaurants or cafes did you visit? Try to make your routine brighter. Spend at least one or two days as if you have just started seeing each other and try to find common interests with your partner.
- The next thing you should do is try to turn your different interests into a marvelous mixture. For example, one of you likes singing, another one likes listening to music. Why don’t you go to Karaoke? You both will have a chance to spend a good time together. You will definitely have fun. Another thing, which can help you find common interests, is food. One of you likes cooking, another likes eating goof food. You could have an evening of mutual cooking. It does not matter that one of you cannot do something, it is important that you will be doing a common thing.
- It is vital that you do not depreciate your partner’s interests. So if you do have different interests, which you cannot share, you can make an agreement that there will be a special day or time when your partner will have the time for it. You also have to develop yourself, don’t you?
- If you have different interests with your partner, I would advise you not to leave their life unattended, even if you decide to give each other time for your own hobbies. You should ask how they spent their time and be happy for them. Do not forget to tell about your day, what you like and what you are interested in. Share your impressions, positive emotions and you will find common topics and hobbies.
- Finally, it is true that different interests can make a real problem, so if a couple want to stay together, they must find common interests. One of the best ways to do it is to talk. Tell your partner that you want to spend more time together. Do not make any claims or accusations. Let it be a constructive conversation.
- To find common interests with your partner you could take a piece of paper each and write down 20 pastimes each of you would like to do with your beloved. The list can include the activities you like doing or have never tried before, but want to try. Then exchange your lists and mark each activity with 1-10 points. If the activity gets more than 5 points from each of you, you can do it together. When you have united your different interests into one list, all you have to do is plan your free time so that you could do them together.
I do not insist that the advice you have just read is a guide to action, but if you cherish your relationship, you must not let such a thing like different interests be the reason of your breakup.