How to be a good matchmaker?
Since old times in every village there was one person who was responsible for creating families – a matchmaker. It was usually a woman, known by everyone and according to a tradition she was the one to go to the future bride’s parents and ask for the girl’s hand. It is interesting, that a decent girl was thought to refuse to get married at the first proposal and the parents of a potential bride said “No” for three times. If the girl finally agreed to get married, she came into the room and scratched the furnace. In case she did not like the man, she brought a pumpkin to the matchmaker. Usually it used to be a plump and a strict woman, who is depicted in many movies. Nowadays they look a bit different, they are more up-to-date. There are common stereotypes how people imagine employees working in the matchmaking field: they are all stunningly beautiful ladies, who wear dresses and high-heeled shoes, always smile and drink champagne.
The reality is quite different. A good matchmaker have to have many characteristics and skills. In fact this person has to be born with the skill to match people. It`s a skill you either have it or you don`t. How says Janis Spindel “You definitely need to be intuitive to be a matchmaker”.
Great matchmaker is always a good listener. She can spend hours listening about your love experience and life stories, your doubts and your fears. She is a good therapist as well. She doesn`t only listen but gives you the practical advice. She can see people from the inside, she knows exactly what you need and how to help you. She is your personal “soul X-ray”. It is a sensitive subject for people to talk about their personal life and it is not easy to open up in front of other person and share your secrets.
She is a good example regardless to single or in a relationship she is. She always has a positive attitude. She looks and feels as a balanced and shiny person. She knows exactly how to feel happy every single day not by books, but by her own example. She loves what she does.
The best matchmakers believe that “there`s a lid to every pot”. Everyone deserves to be happy regardless to appearance, age or nationality. If a client has enormous requirements, she will refuse you in providing the service in case you`re not going to change your mind. She will not promise to match a 70ty years old man to 20ty something years old lady. There is a common sense of course.
She matches only singles to singles and doesn`t work with the clients who are in the middle of divorce or separated. Clients of a good matchmaker are marriage-oriented people. She is not a healer to broken-hearted people.
She doesn`t judge clients` preferences and clients` way of life. Instead she is a good therapist who wants to help you and provides invaluable guidance through the matchmaking process. She is clients` life coach who supports them and shows the right direction during the whole process.
How to be a good matchmaker? Never stop developing. Attend various seminars, master classes and trainings. Be a participant of famous worldwide alliances and take international awards. Pay attention if you can see the winning attributes on the office wall or on a site of matchmaking agency you are going to work with. She works for result and celebrates success.
She is a public person, social butterfly, everyone she talks to is a job prospect for her. She has a keen eye.
The happily married couples are the best award.
My female acquaintance is like that. Even though she hasn’t chosen it as a profession, but she has all the skills for it. We always encourage her to think about it. I am always telling her: “Marina, put your charity into practice and you are going to create more and more couples, but already on international level”. She is a great host of the parties. Every time she organizes a party at home, someone meets his soulmate there. She loves creating team-building exercises and keeps the spirit. She is an English teacher and she told me an exciting story about her “matchmaking experience” during the lesson courses. One course is 8-months length, it is quite a long period of time. Usually the group is built from the scratch, nobody knows each other. From the very beginning students are very distant. She does her magic by conducting different ice-breakers games, get-to-know questionnaires that by the end of the course, there is definitely one couple, who managed to develop feelings to each other. It is pleasant for her, because she also indirectly took part in creation of one more unit. She loves her job.
I wish everyone who is looking for love to be in hands of professional intuitive matchmaker. There would be more happy people and more love on the planet.