How to maintain a happy relationship with a Ukrainian woman
– You are beautiful, but empty, — continued the Little Prince. “I don’t want to die for you. Of course, looking at my rose, a casual passer-by will say that it is exactly the same as you. But it alone is dearer to me than all of you. After all, it was it, and not you, I watered every day. I covered it, not you, with a glass cover. It was obscured by a screen, protecting it from the wind. For it, I killed caterpillars and left only two or three to hatch butterflies. I listened to it complaining and bragging, I listened to it even when it was silent. It is mine.
The Little Prince
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Why would I start this article with a quotation from a famous work by a famous writer? That is because it reveals the main point of what you are about to read: if you wonder how to maintain a happy relationship, you must behave like the Little Prince with his rose – cherish it and take the responsibility for your partner.
The fact is that we are not too happy with the idea that “relationships need to be worked on.” What nonsense is this, but what about love? Why is a harmonious union, arising from a great and bright feeling, is not able to magically work by itself, like a well-oiled machine?
Unfortunately, even the heroes of fairy tales do not hope for this. A relationship with a Ukrainian woman really needs effort, and it can be strong and happy – if you know the right hacks. Generally, a romantic bond can be strengthened and improved by working in two ways:
• demanding more from yourself,
• demanding more from your lady.
No magic is required, everything is extremely simple and outlined below in ten tips, following which you get the right chance to extend your love bond to the “forever” regime.
1. Don’t sacrifice your privacy.
You can be passionate about each other, but this does not mean that the rest of your life should dissolve in selfless adoration. Don’t forget your friends and family, don’t give up your evening work out in the gym, Saturday football with friends… Take care of independence, you can still do whatever you want. It invigorates, supports self-esteem, and saves the relationship from routine and boredom.
2. Be honest about your feelings
Tell yourself the truth: are you really happy? Are you satisfied? Physically, emotionally, mentally? Do you ever think of marrying a Ukrainian woman you are dating? If you are connected only by breathtaking sex, sooner or later there will be a problem in communication. If you entertain each other with a play on words, but at the same time intimacy gets “C” – the forecast is also unfavorable. Or are you satisfied with both the mind and the physiology? The secret of strong reciprocity lies in a strong and natural connection on all counts; so make sure everything is like this between you, or at least it longs for it.
3. Do not torment your lady with jealousy.
This is the main answer to the question: how to be happy in a long-distance relationship? At first, you might be far from each other, so just understand your dear has some things to do and she cannot be “always there” when you want. “Where are you? Who are you with? What are you doing?” If you bombard her with messages 24/7, call a hundred times a day, you won’t do better. Be more confident in yourself, do not worry, she won’t go anywhere.
4. Do not seek to please and adapt
The desire to please is based on the expectation of positive feedback: love, kindness, gratitude. However, the world is unreasonably generous with negativity, and people will gladly use you, recognizing YOUR need to give yourself completely. Relationships are a two-way street: please your dear, but make sure she does the same for you too. Strive for a healthy balance of dedication and selfishness. And, please, do not get fooled by the fear of loneliness, agreeing to options from the series “let it be so” – this approach is far from a way of how to have a happy relationship.
5. Don’t avoid problems
Nobody likes conflicts. Undoubtedly, there are people who are entertained by strife, but, apparently, they are in the minority. But what happens if partners, not wanting to sort things out, constantly turn on the avoidance mode? Nothing good. If you avoid problems for years, they accumulate, and one day you’ll wake up 25 years later and realize that you have no chance to solve them because you have long forgotten where it all began. Don’t suppress negative (or positive) emotions. Talk to your partner about any issues bothering you. Firstly, you are a team, which means you need to work together to overcome adversity. And secondly, you always deserve respect and the right to speak up.
6. Make time for each other.
Yes, you have your own life, but, on the other hand, you need to find a balance between the private and the general, otherwise, the relationship may wither at the most promising stage. Your connection needs care and attention, confessions and walks, surprises and gifts, romantic dates, and cozy home evenings. Be creative and spare no energy to fuel your feelings.
7. Make equal efforts
How to keep a relationship strong and happy without making any efforts? There is no such way. It is believed you have to work 50/50 on it. However, it is nonsense, as only both partners must make 100% efforts every day to maintain the right degree and dynamics of their bond. It is difficult to expect harmony from the connection “100 to 20”, “100 to 50” or even “100 to 99”. You must be on an equal footing. If your union is out of balance, you need to talk about it to get back on track.
Finally, my last ingredient to the recipe of how to be happy in a relationship is being able to admit the partner’s achievements and not trying to change her. You are the one who decides how to take the situation: sit and cry over your destiny, or accept what you have and find good points about it (surely, if you feel good with each other). YOU are the only one responsible for your life. Accept it and enjoy your life. Good luck!
Valeriia Matskevich with Love.