How to save the “sparkle” when dating long?
If you have a love of your life, you are blessed! Partners who managed to find secrets on how to maintain a long term relationship have an emotional bond, a great sexual life, common jokes, deep conversations, their own victories and falls, which they survived and learnt a lesson from. I have always been admiring couples who have been together for a long time and wondered how the managed to keep a long term relationship. They are secure, optimistic and have a higher self-esteem. I believe in eternal love, but I do believe that it is an enormous hard work. It is not just a blessing from heaven, which is given to one couple and not given to another one. Everything depends only on your efforts. You have a power to create your own happiness!
When two loving people start any kind of relationship (married life, civil marriage or just dating), they do not even think that one day their feelings can fade. They believe that passion will be always with them. However it tends to transform into a more kinship relationship, which is, of course, very good, however it is really important to save the “sparkle”, which appeared in the beginning.
How to stay in a long relationship and keep the spark alive? Our tips for a lasting relationship will help you!
- The first thing how to keep a long relationship going is to keep passion. Unfortunately the first sparkle, which united you, is not enough to make your love last forever. Routine life and problems make many couples forget about it, as it is difficult to remember the word “passion”, when your everyday conversations are about dinner. Still, it is possible to revive the excitement adding something new to your relationship. Believe me, there is no need to spend lots of money … You can start with a weekly walk to the places in your own city you have never been to. Even such a simple thing will give you a lot of topics for discussion and a chance to make common plans for the following weeks. You can also diversify your “trips”: go cycling, enjoy a day in the countryside, etc. Just seeing each other every day and being physically present in the same space is not enough. You should go above and beyond to establish emotional intimacy between you. Expand your minds, find common hobbies and have fun together! Enjoying a hobby together can keep the spark alive and make your relationship strong and healthy. Even if you are both busy at work, you should find time for yourself. Are you both gym lovers and work out three times per week? Why not hit the gym together? Also you can go on a hike or get your bikes out, it is very romantic and you are going to enjoy it for sure if you like healthy activities. Cook a meal together. You can choose a dish, which you have never tried before, but would like to try. Are you both keen on French or Italian cuisine? Put some romantic background music, pop open a bottle of nice wine and enjoy cooking, tease each other and have a great time in the kitchen! You can even make a competition to create a fun spirit! Regular date nights will make your routine romantic.
- If you want to build lasting relationship stay connected. Then listen more than you talk. Imagine that you have come home with breathtaking news and your partner has not even looked at you sitting at the computer says “Yep… That’s great.” Or, hearing the news she hugs you, kisses and says “That’s amazing! I knew you could make it!” Which of two variants do you like more? The second one obviously. So, if you want your partner to behave like that, do the same. Be attentive, care about your woman; be interested in what she is telling, even if it is another story about her “usual day at work”. Women are more sensitive, they can become overwhelmed by some minor details or just be impressed by a street art work or just a conversation with a neighbor. My female friend, who has been married for 7 years says that she just wants her husband to listen and be genuinely interested, not just nod his head. She needs his support and just simply be a part of the conversation. It really means a lot.
- Create lasting memories together and you will never get bored. Travelling is the best what you can do. You will learn so much together, you never know what awaits you in another country. Either you wander around Asia, climb the mountains, explore Bali markets, sunbathe in the Dominican republic, head to Fiji or explore the Middle East, adventure and romance is right there for you. Find the location, which you both prefer and spend quality time together! If you want to celebrate an anniversary somewhere in a special place, book a cruise and sail. It is going to be the most unforgettable experience in your life. You, your soulmate and the ocean…. What can be more romantic? It is definitely unusual and fascinating. The idea of taking a cruise is romantic in itself, but to strengthen your emotions you may book a renewal of vows with the captain of the ship. It is a very touching event, which takes place on the highest deck. The whole procedure is very touching and revives the day of your marriage. You can even wear the same wedding outfits, the bride holds a bouquet of flowers like on the wedding day. You are escorted to deck 17 of a huge ship and the captain makes a speech. Believe me, it is really impressive and brings you both to tears.
- How to make a long term relationship work? Be ready to make a compromise. If, for some reason, your lady does not want to go to the cinema, saying she is tired and to be honest wants to relax at home, do not try to force her. At least you can offer her to have some rest and go later. Try to find the variant, which will suit both of you. But if your lady agrees to go despite being tired, or sacrifices her plans for yours, do not forget to show your appreciation, since she has done it to make YOU happy.
- One of the keys to a lasting relationship is taking your responsibilities seriously. Wishing to make your relationship last longer is not enough. You must do something to show your loyalty to your woman. Since if she is the one who always does the “dirty” job: sacrifices her interests, apologizes, listens to your problems and tries to solve them, asks about your feelings, while you do not respond in the same way, nothing will work out.
- Another way to re-sparkle your routine is to recall the moments dear to your hearts. Look through the old photos, remember how it all began, and laugh at your love adventures. You can also turn on the music associated with some special moments: first dance, first kiss, etc. Even though in the digital world it is becoming fashionable to keep photos on digital devices, you can print the most memorable ones and organize them in a photo album. You may even add some nice words or a joke that you shared at that moment. My friends have an amazing wedding photo album, it is a real masterpiece and they recollect their sweet memories by looking at the photos and it brings a pleasant feeling. At the moment distance separated them, her husband went abroad for some part-time job and this album keeps her heart warm.
- It is also important to understand that the union of two people cannot exist at its peak all the time. So, to add some zest to your sexual life, for example, try to change the setting: go to a motel, have a night in the nature, or spend it in your car, enjoying the lights of the night city. If you do not want to go anywhere, create romantic atmosphere at home. Light the candles, order meals from the restaurant, turn on romantic music… And to finish your fantastic evening properly, take a bath together and go to bed decorated with rose petals. It will definitely help you brighten up and excite each other. Doing massages for each other is a great way to evoke passion and create intimacy.
- You can also play role-games having discussed the details in advance. For example: a man is waiting for the woman at a set place with a bouquet of flowers. She is, of course, a little late. Then they take a long walk and have a dinner in a cozy café with live music. You can finish your gorgeous romantic evening in a pre-booked hotel. This adds some taste to routine, doesn’t it?
- One of the best long term relationships advice I can give is keep the romance alive. You may go camping and enjoy stargazing. It is a perfect scene for dreams and secrets, let your souls speak to each other. Find a beautiful spot, put a tent, make some barbeques. The whole process will add some adventurous spirit and develop your collaborative skills. One of the couples I know likes such activity. They usually do it in summer or spring. They always “work as a team” and it helps them to take off their minds from a real world. Once they had a movie under the stars near the campfire. It was the most unforgettable experience.
Finally, always remember that sitting doing nothing and watching your feelings fade away is not the way out. Love is a wonderful feeling between a man and a woman, so it is absolutely important to bring that initial sparkle through your long-term relationship. I hope this article helped you to find the answer for the question “how to make a long term relationship last?”.