Today I would like to answer one of the most popular questions: what is the matchmaking process by really like? First of all I want to highlight that is a premium offline boutique matchmaking service. We don’t do online because we find it less efficient than traditional matchmaking service. We do not have an open catalogue of profiles neither male nor female because we respect privacy of our clients.

The matchmaking process will include 4 main stages. It would be different for paying male clients and free female members.

Let’s discuss the stages of matchmaking process that a male client will go through

The first stage will take place even before a potential male clients becomes client.  

Lets call it pre-stage of the matchmaking process.

After the gentleman fills in the form at our website he is contacted by our manager. The manager will answer all the questions the potential male client might have. After this the manager will schedule the first free interview of the potential male client with our leading matchmaker. At the moment I personally conduct 100% of all first free interviews and this is why we kindly ask all our potential male clients not to be late for their appointments.  

Prior to the interview our manager will ask the potential client to fill in the questionnaire. It will include questions that will help us to find out some basic information about you, your interests and hobbies, level of education and background. The matchmaker really needs this information to get ready to the interview with you and to use your time during the interview more efficiently and not to have to invest time into questions like “how old are you” or “what city are you from”.

During the interview I will ask you some questions based on the questionnaire you have filled in and also we will concentrate on determining the direction of the potential matchmaking process. The questions during the interview will be individual for each client so we do not provide a list beforehand. Usually the first free interview takes about 20-30 minutes. Also during the interview our potential male client has a possibility to ask the matchmaker all his questions regarding matchmaking process. Sometimes after the interview we ask a potential male client to complete a little “home work” to understand the direction of the potential matchmaking process better. For example, we can ask to send us photos of ladies he finds attractive.

After the interview and completed homework we suggest several profiles from our base to make sure we understand the direction of the potential matchmaking process.  After this if we see that what the client claims he wants and what he really wants and needs is something we can deliver, we suggest to sign an official contract with us and to become our client. If unfortunately we see that we can’t fully meet the demands of the potential client we honestly explain that we cannot sign him as a client. Usually it happens when expectations of the potential male client are unrealistic and it is not humanly possible to fulfil his demands: for example, a 75 years old male claims he “feels attracted” ONLY to ladies in their 20s.

The pre-matchmaking stage is vitally important to us. We love keeping our success rate high, so we have to really understand the needs and expectations of our potential male clients. We have to make sure that these expectations do not contradict the principles of or professional matchmaking ethics.

If after the interview we see that we have enough candidates in our base to fulfil the expectations of our potential male client then we suggest starting the real matchmaking process with us. Usually we interview about 20-25 ladies to pick up one who would be the most appropriate candidate for our male client, so to schedule lets say 5 dates with 5 ladies we can end up interviewing 100-125 ladies.  Only if we see that we can deliver what the client wants and needs we suggest signing the contract with us and starting the matchmaking process.

After the pre-stage the client will go through the first stage of the matchmaking process.

The first stage of the matchmaking process

We will have more interviews with our male client to understand his needs and priorities better. At the same time we will start conducting the interviews with the ladies together with our psychologist. This stage will take at least 4 to 5 weeks. During the interviews we will find out more about the lady, her life priorities, opinion regarding gender roles, family life and much more. If during the interview we see that the lady has similar vision about relationship, family and life goals as our male client we tell a lady more about our male client.  Of course the lady has to match all the search criteria that we’ve agreed with the male client beforehand and put down in written in our agreement (for example, age group, marital status: never married/divorce, level of education, language skills, body type, hair colour, etc.). If the lady has shown sincere interest in our male client we show her the photos of our male client and provide her with more details about him. After that we suggest the profile of the lady to our male client, share more information about her and our impression during the interview. The male client will be considering only those ladies who have already showed interest in him.

We don’t believe that having an open online catalogue is efficient for the male client. Usually it is just a waste of time. The client can put his finger at profiles of ladies who would never choose him back for numerous reasons: she might be not open to relocate to New Zealand, not willing to date with an age gap, feels attracted ONLY to guys taller than 6.2, not open to date a gentleman with children, etc. After all a gentleman can “choose” by himself at any dating site where there are hundred of thousands of different profiles. He can contact numerous candidates by himself just to find out that they are “not interested”, “are not willing to commit”, “are not interested in having more kids”, etc. It is a job of a professional matchmaker to preselect the best candidates for the exact client and to vet out those ladies who won’t be good matches for this exact gentleman. It is a job of a professional matchmaker to save the time of the client and prevent him from unnecessary stress. This is why we do not have an open base of clients neither male nor female.

Pretty often gentlemen do not really understand the importance of this first stage of the matchmaking process and don’t fully appreciate it. They feel more excited about the second stage of the matchmaking process – the dates. As a professional matchmaker with 10 years of experience I can assure you that the first stage of the matchmaking process is the most crucial. If you do not preselect great candidates – matches for your male client then he will have less chances to achieve great results. This is why we take this stage really seriously and always pay a close attention to details.

Second stage of the matchmaking process  – the dates

Gentlemen often think that it is the most important part of the matchmaking process and as we have already discussed they are wrong. Still this is definitely the most fun part! Not only the gentleman is looking forward meeting the ladies, but also the ladies feel excited about the upcoming dates. Well, the entire team is excited! Of course we can’t control how the date will actually go because a lot will depend on the attitude of the gentleman. We can provide our client with necessary dating tips and advice and make sure that he doesn’t have to worry about anything and can fully concentrate his attention on dating.

The last stage – post-matchmaking process

After the gentleman has travelled to Ukraine and has met the ladies he continues communicating with one or several ladies. During this stage he will understand with which lady he feels strong mutual attraction and will start bringing their acquaintance to the next level – relationship. This is the stage when couples decide to be in exclusive boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, this is the stage of romantic proposals, beautiful engagement rings and big decisions – in which country they will start their family.

We keep consulting our clients through this stage not only because we have worked so hard to help them reach this stage, but also because this is the stage when small misunderstandings start messing things up.

For example, one of the couples we have recently introduced has decided to go steady. Our male client (33 years old) and our female client (25 years old) have hit it off right from the first date and after several meetings at neutral territory our male client has decided to surprise his girlfriend with a romantic getaway to Mexico. He has booked the hotel and the plane tickets for his girlfriend with a very convenient layover in Canada. Unfortunately he didn’t know that with a Ukrainian passport you have to get a transit visa for the layover in Canada. It is not hard to get it but it is pretty time consuming. So instead of the romantic surprise his girlfriend was freaking out because she didn’t have enough time to get this transit visa and she was super stressed about it because in her mind she would upset her boyfriend. Her boyfriend on the other hand thought that she felt reluctant to meet with him and that her feelings to him have started to fade. After a skype call with our office everyone breathed out: our male client has changed the tickets for the layover in Paris, his Ukrainian girlfriend has concentrated on last minutes preparation to the trip and their vacation in Mexico was truly romantic and excited (I have seen the photos).

Also during this stage we never forget to remind our male clients about anniversaries, birthdays and other important dates that their Ukrainian girlfriends care about. This year we have organized lunch deliveries to the office of one of our female clients, because her boyfriend – our male client has decided to show her how much he cares about her. She was really busy with studying and working at the same time so his idea has won her heart completely.

I hope that this information was useful for you and now you have a better understanding of what to expect from us.

Svetlana Mukha, with love