When Should I Text Her

So, the first evening out is over and you feel there is a point in continuing the communication. You agree to get in touch later. Still, the question is: when exactly is this “later”? How long to wait before texting a girl? Or, maybe, it is better to make a phone call?

It depends on what is normal for you and, especially, for the lady. To find it out, it is better to ask in advance. Generally, you could do both: send a message or phone. Older people are used to picking up the phone and not typing something, but calling in person. It always looked more respectful. Now there is no such requirement since the ways of communication have changed. Therefore, if exchanging messages on such an important issue is accepted by both partners, then, of course, it is better to write. It is better because many people experience tremendous excitement when communicating on such a delicate topic as developing a love bond, texting a girl for the first time will be less stressful.

However, I should admit that we, ladies, really like messaging. Why? There are at least two reasons:

  1. It is a fun emotional game. As an example, SMS could contain more than one meaning, a hidden subtext. By nature, women love to think over what you mean, whether you are serious or are you kidding. So, give us such an opportunity.
  2. There is no “communication pressure”. We have a chance to answer you via SMS when it is convenient for us, while on the phone we need to immediately make decisions regarding your proposals.

When should you text a girl? If you do not know when the exact moment she is expecting you to write is because you haven’t asked about it, I advise you not to draw on your own norms of behavior, which are typically based on two principles “not to wreck your self-esteem” and “not to be pushy in order not to scare the lady away”. The first one meaning a man must not rush to get a woman but wait a little, or he might become not so valued by his chosen one. Please note that this norm is supported by women. If the lass is not too worried about any rules, you might “show up” whenever you want (not at 3 a.m, though); it won’t make you lose your dignity.

Speaking of the second principle, if you start ringing or writing right after you say goodbye, and also the next morning, afternoon, and evening, a lady may be frightened of such pressure and completely disappear from sight. And, this is also true, since an overly obsessive partner might be prone to troubled relationships in the future, which is dangerous.

What is the best time to text a girl or call her? Right in the morning following your date say everything was great. It’s also a good idea to arrange the next meeting, as an example, in a day, two, or on some “logical” day – like Saturday or Sunday to spend longer hours together; or, Friday – the traditional moment for hanging out in this way.

The message should be calm and unobtrusive, but warm and sincere. You could even think of funny texts to send her. (Most likely, the lady won’t answer immediately, but she will not delay for too long. So, the normal response period is several hours after receiving your SMS.) It shows you are quite interested in continuing (so quickly), but at the same time controlling your impulses and not “drooling” (calm style). And, of course, you shouldn’t bombard texts to the girl you like, asking why she hasn’t answered yet, but wait a bit and send another SMS saying: “I wrote to you, but there is no answer. Have you, my soul, received my note?”

Another way to answer the question “when should I text her after getting her number?” is to show more restraint and demonstrate that you are reasonably interested and you want to play a leading role in the relationship. That is, you can remind about yourself in a day or two. It is a normal period when you are eagerly awaited (if, of course, she will be waiting at all).

If it takes you 3-4 days to reply “should I text her?” question, then, most likely, the lass is most likely to be greatly annoyed because it is too long you have been silent. So, there is a risk of being rude; but when you explain you were in a hopeless situation, you could be forgiven. Well, if you turn up in a week, it is more likely, the woman will pretend she does not recognize you.

Generalizing everything mentioned above, here are the main rules of messaging with a lady:

  1. Don’t take the same time to answer the woman’s messages. Once do it immediately, and sometimes 10 minutes later, or don’t answer at all.
  2. Track the lady’s response time and add a little more to yours. For example, if she answers in 3 minutes, answer in 4.
  3. Never write last. Sometimes you need to give the woman an opportunity to do this. Why? Because it gives you the ability to control the communication and write to the lass the next morning.
  4. Do not send SMS to women between 8 pm and 1 am on Friday and Saturday nights, because it may seem that you have not found better things to do.
  5. Moreover, all attempts to start communicating with a woman after 1 am will be perceived ambiguously. Do not do this.

And, remember the main thing – all the rules are relative. If something doesn’t suit you, then it doesn’t. If your partner thinks the same way, then you are on the same wavelength. But, if she follows rules, you need to understand and follow them too if you want the desired result.

P.S. I couldn’t leave you without any ideas of what to include into your cyber love note:

  1. It was a great date and I would love to repeat it!
  2. You should not write long and emotional messages not to alienate the girl. It is also desirable to use emoticons.

  3. I would love to see you again, but I have a lot to do, let’s meet next week!
  4. It is a great option if you liked the date, but you don’t want to rush.

  5. I suggest going to the movies this week for the premiere of the new movie!
  6. This message would be appropriate if, for example, you discussed your favorite films on your first date. It could make a hint you remember the first meeting. It is also a sign that you were listening carefully.

  7. I doubt the date could be better?
  8. A little flirting never does harm if your date is successful. It could show you like the girl and want to see her again. The main thing is not to overdo it!

  9. I can’t sleep after our meeting!
  10. The perfect end to a successful date. There is nothing wrong with sharing your emotions with a lady.

  11. Simply wish the girl “Good night!” or “Enjoy your dreams!” We do appreciate it and it makes us sure that everything went well.

Valeria Matskevich With Love.