Dear gentlemen, when you ask a Ukrainian lady out you should always keep in mind that she is not expecting to pay the bill at the date. It is just not in our culture. If after the date you ask the lady to share the bill with you, then this will be your first and last date with her. She will decide that you didn’t like her and such an offer itself will count as a huge disrespect. Feminism hasn’t reached Ukraine yet so dramatically as Western countries. The ladies in Ukraine believe that the biggest obligation of the lady on the first date is to be beautiful. You would be really surprised how much time, energy and money Ukrainian ladies spend to look good for the date.
We’ve made a survey among our female clients and in general a Ukrainian lady spends 40-60 minutes to get ready right before the date (to get dressed) and up to 5 hours in total making her nails, preparing her hair, getting new shoes or dress, doing make-up or even visiting a make-up studio or a hairdresser right before the date to get a perfect make-up and hair. As you can see Ukrainian woman is investing her time, money and energy into a first date even though it can be the first and last date with the gentleman and she will have to repeat the whole routine again for the next date.
Last year we have been sponsoring the event for the ladies where I also was speaking about dating, matchmaking and searching for your best half and as a sponsor we had to provide several gifts for the lottery. We have decided to be more creative than that and set a “competition”. There were about 300 Ukrainian girls of different ages and professions at the event and we have asked them to describe the worst first date that they ever had and the “winners” would get a “compensation” from us – a beautiful bagpack with our logo.
To our surprise so many ladies have volunteered to share their nightmare first dates. One of the ladies said that the gentleman during their first date told her “you can not only have a drink but also eat something small”. The ladies in the audience were nodding their heads recognizing themselves in similar situations.
Another lady told that she has met a guy online and he has invited her out on Saturday night. She has spent Friday lunch break shopping for a new dress. On Saturday she has spent 4 hours at a beauty saloon getting a fresh manicure and pedicure and refreshing her haircut. Before the date she went to another beauty saloon to get her make-up and hair done. From the salon she took a taxi to return back home and change and at 7 p.m. her date came over to pick her up by his car. She didn’t have a chance to eat properly during the day, because she was busy with her beauty routine, so she was pretty hungry and her date has taken her to the coffee shop similar to American Starbucks. They had coffee and sandwiches there. He told her about all his difficulties at work, his witchy ex-wife, all his friends and expensive vacation he just had. He has paid the bill which was about 20$ and told her that he lived in the walking distance from that coffee shop, so it would be not reasonable for him to drive her to the other part of the city, where she lived. Besides, he has picked her from home, so for sure she can afford a taxi and the metro station was located nearby. Just like that at 10 p.m. he stood up and walked back home. At 10 p.m. she was wearing a thin dress, uncomfortable shoes and was really far from her apartment. The battery of her phone went low, so she had to ask the staff of the coffee shop to call her a taxi. She had to wait for 30 minutes because taxi drivers were not willing to go to that area. It has started to rain. The taxi has finally arrived and the taxi driver has tried to be “funny” and flirt with her. She got home at almost midnight sad, disappointed and hungry. The taxi back home cost her 25$. She has spent about 80$ to do her hair, nails and make-up especially for this date. The taxi from beauty saloon cost her 10$, the new dress – 70$. She has spent her Saturday getting ready for that “date”. Two days after that guy from the terrible date called her to ask if she was interested to come over to him and watch a movie. She declined his offer. She has invested so much time, passion, hope and money into that “date” and she has decided to share that experience with 300 ladies, so finally she got the compensation – our bagpack.
Another lady has shared a story. A friend of a colleague invited her to the movie. He has bought the tickets and emailed them to her beforehand, which she thought was nice. He has texted her, that he knew she would be driving past his house on her way to the cinema and has asked her to pick him up. She has agreed. When she got the address and has googled it, it turned out he lived in the opposite part of the city. On Friday night it took her 50 minutes to drive to his area to pick him up. Another 40 minutes to drive to the cinema. After the movie he has suggested to have some drinks at the bar by the cinema. He had a glass of wine and she had to have water, because she was driving and that bar didn’t serve non-alcohol drinks. After the “drinks” he has asked, if she could drive him back home because he has bought the tickets and it would be fair, if she has invested into their date too. She felt too polite to say no. On the way back he has asked if it was ok if she stops by the 24/7 supermarket, because he really needed to buy something. They went to the supermarket and he bought some food. She almost drove him back home when he has asked if they could stop by his favorite bakery. She said that probably it was already closed on Friday night. She was right. The next 30 minutes they were looking for a place that worked at night and sold croissants, which he eventually didn’t buy “because they were not fresh enough”. She drove him safely home after midnight. Her phone battery went low and she couldn’t use the Google map anymore to find the way out of the new unknown area. She got lost several times and when she finally got home her parking lot in front of her house was taken, so she had to search for a free parking spot, which happened to be two blocks away. Alone at Friday night she was walking back home holding her fancy stilettos in her hand in case she had to run. When she finally got home she had two glasses of wine and texted her “date” that she hoped he made it safe back home. He has texted her next morning, that he did not feel a “sparkle” between them. She got a backpack from us and became my matchmaking client. She already had several great dates with one interesting gentleman.
Dear gentleman, if you want your date to be successful and you want to leave a good impression about yourself, please make sure during the date you have fed the lady, she is not thirsty or cold and she got home safely. If you ask out a Ukrainian lady make sure you know the restaurant where you invite her. Make sure it is open on the time of the date and doesn’t host a birthday party of loud teenagers. Book the table in advance. Make sure you can afford this restaurant, which means you can pay for the food and the drinks. Keep in mind that you shouldn’t order the cheapest wine in the wine list. Choose in the middle of the list. And if you want to show the lady that this date is truly special to you and it is not just a random date – bring flowers. The lady will understand that you are interested, that you took time to choose and get flowers for her and for sure she will appreciate this. If you want to avoid all the dating planning mistakes and don’t want to be the “hero” of someone’s worst date I recommend to subscribe to our YouTube channel and of course to use professional matchmaking services.
Svetlana Mukha, with love♥